I did my job as a Mom. I did the playdates, birthday parties, soccer, and the many lessons. I loved, cried, encouraged, comforted, disciplined (when necessary) and listened. The kids are done (almost) with college. Now what? Now what!
Dads your boys are watching you!
They see how you are treating the ladies around you.
They see that you opened the door for your family members and then stayed behind to keep the door open for that single lady walking in or that old person struggling to walk.
Your boys see that!
Thank you for letting them see your kindness.
Thank you for opening the door.
I convinced my girlfriends to indulge in an American favorite…ice cream! After all we were having a birthday celebration.
A trip back to Mrs A’s to pick up our food and then off to another friend’s 4th of July party.
Kids in the pool…don’t need to worry.
Kids on the jumping gym…don’t need to worry.
Fireworks…don’t need to worry.
Too much food….don’t need to worry.
Yep! When it is just you and your girlfriends you get to go to the celebration without worrying if your kids will drown in the pool, hurt themselves in the bounce house, burn themselves on fireworks or eat too much and get a tummy ache.
The only one eating too much this day is little ‘ole ME!
All we needed to worry about is visiting with friends and getting a piece of that lemon cake we made with love.
Yep…life isn’t too bad as an empty nest middle aged mom!
Reminisce with me as I listen to the songs I so proudly sang in grade school…
The Battle Hymn of the Republic.
Yankee Doodle…I always liked this song when I was young. I think there was some hand motions we made up to go with the song.
Do they sing these songs in school now…as much as we did?
Do our kids really understand how lucky we are to live in a free country and to call America home?
Of course 4th of July always includes fireworks! This year I tried to take some pictures with the help of a 6th grade girl who befriended me. She gave me advice like to turn the flash off. Her way of hinting that I needed to turn the flash off, “The light is hurting my retina!” Haa Haa “I told her I was an amateur.” She said, “Let me see your camera. I will play around with it so you can turn the flash off.” Well, I got the hint to turn the flash off (quite frankly I was so amazed with all the fireworks that I didn’t realize it was on. Woops!) She then preceded to tell me, “Keep clicking, keep clicking, keep clicking. Click fast!” Sooooo I did as any middle aged mom would do and listen to a preteen. I clicked and I clicked and I clicked and before you knew it the fireworks were over. Thanks to my new friend, I think I got some pretty good pictures of the fireworks. What do you think?
Peter Seger and the Byrds sang the song Turn! Turn!Turn! (to Everything there is a Season) in the 1960’s. Peter wrote the song based on the Book of Ecclesiastes from the Bible.
To everything there is a season. And a time to every purpose, under Heaven.
A time to be born, a time to die. A time to plant, a time to reap.
A time to laugh, a time to weep.
A time to cast away stones, a time to gather stones together.
A time of love, a time of hate. A time of war, a time of peace.
A time you may embrace. A time to refrain from embracing.
As young girls we look forward to the time when our body changes and we get to wear our first bra and make-up.
Then we look forward to our driver license and the freedom that comes with that.
College is the next big turning point along with turning 21.
One dream many of us girls have from a very young age is getting married.
We think about our special day. We dream about our wedding gown, who will be in our wedding, the music that will play and about the details of our reception.
We also think about our Prince charming husband and all the wonderful children we will have together.
We know we will get married and have children.
We know we will get old and become grandparents.
Everyone talks about those two important seasons in our life.
No one talks about the season between our children leaving the nest and becoming grandparents
From of very young age we know we will get our license, graduate from college, get married, have children and then have grandchildren.
What people don’t talk about, is the time when us Moms no longer have the children at home.
The time when our children aren’t married and don’t have children yet.
Evertything has its season. My favorite season was when the kids were home and I got to play Mom. No one warned me about the season between kids leaving and becoming a grandparent.
They don’t talk about this weird period for us moms when we have no responsibilities to our children and have no young ones around to love, nurture and care for.
I am finding this to be a very lonely period of my life.
Children just fill our world with unconditional love, sweetness, and joy.
Children bring happiness into a family.
Being needed as a Grandparent.
I never thought about this period of time in my life. Not a thought.
This season of my life is a season no one prepared me for.
I don’t know how long this season will last. I will do my best to make the most of it.
But darn it, I liked being needed! I liked that season of my life the most! More then getting to wear make-up. More then graduating from college. More then getting married. I liked being a Mom to my school aged kids!
To this season in my life!
Do you struggle with this season? How are you dealing with it?
PS To my dear Sissy, If you happen to read this post it is NOT about pressuring you to have grandbabies. This is all about me and how to deal with the loneliness of not having children around who need me. No pressure here. No pressure! Love you my dear child!
I am excited to read it to discover some insights on how my daughter thinks, handles life and to understand what it is like to be a modern Mom in 2011. It will be interesting to read the perspective of these young mom’s. Through this understanding, I hope that I can be a better grown-up mom. I know that Sissy and New Hubby will be starting a family really soon, my hopes that she can find the work/family life balance that is best for her family. I will definately pass the book on to Sissy in hopes that it will help enlighten the decisions that she will need to face in the near future.
I am looking forward to reading it this weekend and will let you know what I think. I might even attempt to do my first video review.
Filling my gratitude bucket. Thanks, Hollee and Becky, for all the work you put into this book! I can tell just by browsing through it that there will be lots of uh huh moments!
If you have read this book, I would love for you to comment and share your perspective on it!
My sister and I would get a new outfit that would include white panton leather Mary Jane shoes, a pastel colored dress, white gloves and a hat. Oh, my how pretty and special I thought I was!
The day before Easter Mom would boil eggs then Sis and I would dye them.
Easter morning we woke up excited to look for our Easter baskets. it was a race to see who would find theirs first, of course, being the older sister, I always wanted (and mostly did) find my basket first!
We would exam our candy which would include yellow chick peeps, Helen Grace solid chocolate bunny, mild chocolate eggs and a larger peanut butter egg, jelly beans, two hard boiled eggs and robin eggs. I think they were all my favorite…and still are!
Mom would still be sleeping. Dad was usually already at work when we got up in the morning. My sister and I would then get ready for church. Mom sometimes drove us to church but we (sister and I) often walked the mile to the Methodist Church. I don’t remember much about church itself but I am sure God was watching me!
That afternoon we would have Easter dinner. Mom has always been a great cook! Dinner would be served around 2pm in the dining room and would include biscuits, ham, mashed potatoes, corn and peas.
Mom had special blue china that she stored in the cupboard above the refrigerator that she would get out on special occasions. I always loved the little crystal bowl of black olives Mom would put on the dining room table. I would find myself sneaking a few olives every time I walked by the table before dinner.
I will never forget one year after Easter.
We started smelling a terrible odor in the house.
We looked around for days trying to figure out where the rancid odor was coming from. We wondered if something died under the house…
Dad crawled under the house and didn’t see anything. Mom cleaned out the refrigerator and all the trash cans were emptied but still the smell did not go away but only got stronger.
My Sister was not the neatest person in the house. My Dad finally decided that he would dig into her room…
Long and behold he discovered Sister’s Easter basket including what once was hard boiled eggs! Needless to say, Sister was in a lot of trouble and I won’t share here what happened next! (Saving you that story, Sis!)
As a Mom, I tried to always make Easter special for my kids. I continued the tradition of hiding Easter baskets but my kids were not allowed to look for them until they got me up out of bed (if I wasn’t already up). They would wear their new outfits to church but we would all go to church as a family. We would have Easter dinner together that we all did our part in preparing. The Easter baskets would include a Helen Grace solid chocolate bunny but instead of all the other candy, it would include a toy, a book or a movie.
Today College Boy is not able to be with me. Sissy and New Hubby will be over later this afternoon.
This morning I will go to church…by myself.
It will be hard walking into that sanctuary…by myself.
It will be hard looking around the church seeing all the other families…together.
I will sit in the back today…by myself
I will be looking at the families…
wondering what their traditions are…
listening to the message…
singing the songs…
I am sure there will be a few tears…
Tears because I am now in a new chapter in my life.
A new chapter where I have not yet accepted the new title Middle Aged Empty Nest Mom.
I don’t quite know how to act or know what to do as a Middle Aged Empty Nest Mom.
I loved, loved, loved being a young Mom with young ones at home.
It is now time to make new Easter memories.
It is time to enjoy life as a Middle Aged Empty Nest Mom.
I know one day I will accept that title proudly but for today I shall drown myself in my memories of the past…
Happy Easter! What are your childhood memories of Easter?