It has been a year since I left
A year since I left the relationship.
What did I accomplish this year?
Did I do God’s will?
Was this just all part of his plan?
His beautiful awesome plan!
When I said I was leaving the relationship, I was overwhelmed with love and gratitude to the people that reached out to me and opened their homes to me. People that I have known for years and others that I didn’t even know but had heard about me through mutual friends.
These people all believed in me. They were excited for me and the new life I was about to embark on. They were excited to see God’s hand in my life and the words that seemed to ring from everyone were:
PJ you are a good person. You know God and He will lead the way. You are strong. There are big things in store for you. You will find your way. You made the right decision. We love you. We want the best for you. We are here for you. Let people help you.
Let people help me? NO!! I am the one that always helps others! I am the one to bring the meals, to annoymously help others, to tithe, to share my gift of hospitality. To treat others to lunch or buy their coffee. I am the giver and I like that role! I like giving!
I am a giver! A giver!
Receive? Take? I don’t like this role at all! BUT….is this part of the lesson that God has taught me this year? The gift of receiving. The gift of being humble.
Is this just all part of God’s plan?
Is this all part of God’s plan. God’s beautiful wonderful plan?
He also gave me many more gifts this year. The gift of trust and faith. It is only with my trust and faith that I knew I could make it through the transitional year. Lots of trust and faith. Some days I would wake up and just pray, “God, help me just focus on the joy you have planned for me today knowing that I don’t know what tomorrow will bring. Knowing that I am a complete Mary Poppins perfectionist control freak! Knowing I am not in control but you, my Dear Lord, hold my life in your hands.
It was with those words and a few tears that got me through many days.
It was always amazing how God would work in my life those days. Those days when I woke up completely in despair turning to God for His love and with my trust and faith that God has a beautiful wonderful plan for me. For ME His child.
God has a plan!
When the sun went down on those days, I would realize that God held me tight all day. He stayed close to me and those days always were glorious.
I learned to turn more to God. That is a gift from Jesus! One of the many gifts I received this past year.
God has blessed me with the greatest joys
So as I reflect back over the last year, I realize that I may still not have the answers to some of the important questions I have about my life journey today. I still don’t know what I will really do to fill my savings account. I still don’t know where I am going to be living. I still haven’t meant my new husband. What I do know, God has truly blessed me with one of the greatest joys a woman could ever want…
And that joy is being closer to God. Closer to my Father. Closer to living the life that he has chosen for me to live. Oh, my God has blessed me.
It is exciting times! God is in total control of my life. He wants wonderful things for his children and how lucky I am to be one of His cherished children. The blessings are just beginning… God is remarkable! I can’t wait to share with you all the things that God has and is blessing me with.
With just knowing that God is my God…Our God…Yours and my God…
Just knowing this….
I know in my heart…
I know that my life is about to unfold beautiful wonderul blessings…
All you have to do is have trust, faith and believe in God. I want to say that it is easy. But we all know that it isn’t easy. It isn’t easy to turn your life over. It isn’t easy to trust. It is sometimes hard to have faith through the trials and tribulations of life. It isn’t easy to pray, “God, today I give you control to show me your joy in today. Today I trust you that you know the best way for me. I know that you have a wonderful glorious plan for me. I know that through my trials and tribulations that you teach lessons. Dear Lord, today, I will walk where you lead me.”
That is not an easy prayer to say. It is hard to really believe. It is hard to not just take control and make decisions that may not be His will for us. But I know that this year has been my test to myself on how much faith I have in my Lord.
I am proud to say I made it through this year a much stronger woman. I made it through this year because I did have faith and I turned to God (almost) every day.
Let us see what tomorrow will bring…
Question to you…
If you have something that you are struggling with right now, do you have enough faith and trust to turn it over to God. Can you just say a prayer then take a deep breath and release the problem to God to handle? I encourage you to start small… Start with one problem…then eventually as you grow in your faith … you will be able to turn your life over to God and watch the blessings unfold.
As James Stewart would say, “It is a Wonderful Life!”